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Red (2010)

PG-13 (111 mins)

Synopsis: When his peaceful life is threatened by a high-tech assassin, former black-ops agent Frank Moses reassembles his old team in a last ditch effort to survive and uncover his assailants.
Director: Robert Schwentke
Writers: Jon Hoeber (screenplay),  Erich Hoeber (screenplay), Warren Ellis  (graphic novel),  and Cully Hamner  (screenplay)
Stars:  Bruce Willis,  Helen Mirren and Morgan Freeman
Best Boy Grip: Martin Torner
Studio: Summit Entertainment
CraigMakk: (Worth Watching)  With more comic book movies coming out seemingly every month, we inevitably become more discriminatory about what we waste our time with and what we pass over. Short version is: you can pass this one over, and wait to catch it on TV. Long version is: this doesn’t really even totally seem like a comic book movie. Yes, there are the obligatory slow-motion gunfight scenes (which are awesome, but you probably saw the best one, the car spinning departure, during the commercial anyway, so you’re good there), the “one-man survives easily against an army in comic-book fashion” scenes, and even the “soldiers so good they must be comic book heroes”. But if you never heard of this comic book before someone told you it was (SPOILER ALERT: you didn’t), you would probably never even know. In one sense, this movie is a better version of the Expendables, because these guys are legitimately old, yet somehow they still manage to kick some serious ass, and in a way that actually makes sense (not stupid old Sly fighting guys a third his age and not having a massive, Growth Hormone- and steroid-fueled heart attack on set). The problem is, the story stops caring about why everyone wants to kill them pretty quickly, and so will you. And Bruce Willis’ character, while endearingly pathetic in the beginning, becomes just Bruce Willis by the end, which can be a bit annoying (side note: when did he stop being John McClane, and start being a whiny cuckold for even worse Ashton??). In the end, I can definitely recommend this movie as a weekend watch on TV, but there are too many overall story failings to push for you to waste your money. Unless you are like me and made it your life’s goal to see every comic-book movie ever made, then it’s a solid Four Beer Mugs. But that’s just me. I’m a sad, pathetic man. What has my life become? I’m so alone. Why, God?? Why have you forsaken me??? Oh, still here? Ummmm…{sniffle}…Three Beer Mugs it is!

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About CraigMakk

As co-host and producer of the incredible podcast "Live from the ManCave!", I'm also kind of an ass. With that being said, check us out and welcome to the ManCave!

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