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D.O.A.: Dead or Alive (2007)

(PG-13) 86 mins

Synopsis: The movie adaptation of the best selling video game series Dead or Alive.

Director: Corey Yuen

Writers: J.F. Lawton (screenplay & story), Adam Gross (screenplay), and

Stars: Jaime PresslyDevon Aoki and Sarah Carter

Serious Jest:  (Worth Watching)    Don’t get me wrong, this is not a “good” movie, in a conventional sense.  The plot is simplistic, like Mortal Kombat.  The fights are silly, despite the fact that it’s a martial arts flick.  But the stunts (there’s a difference between fight stunts and bona fide, good martial arts), special effects, camera work, and sound effects are pretty frikkin’ cool.  Most importantly, this film is like a Victoria’s Secret catalog: a squad of hot, hard-bodied women grunting, moaning, jumping, bending, punching, kicking, wrestling, diving, pulling, pushing, flexing, stretching…you get the picture.  It’s about as close as you can get to soft porn with a PG-13 rating, and without actual sex scenes.  It’s an erection machine!   I didn’t even know who Carter or Holly Valance were before watching this movie, but they were the hottest of a film full of hot women (and I loooove me some Pressly & Aoki).

If these ladies were laying on me, I'd be a rock, too.

Also, Eric Roberts is still awesome in action flicks, and he kicks ass in his stylish gi.

Roberts was watching movies in 3-D in 2007!

 While I wouldn’t call this a Must Own (or even a Must See), I would personally buy this movie on Blu-ray, just to throw on in the background while I’m doing something else, and stop to watch a scene again or gawk over Carter or Valance every once in a while.

Valance and Carter in one of my favorite scenes, fighting on a rainy beach.

About Serious Jest

Film & TV Reviewer by Choice, Attorney at Law, Marine to the Corps (excuse the pun), Nupe Under Pressure, and MC by Nature

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